Angel ...sara mclachlan
Spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
there's always one reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
oh beautiful release
memory seeps from my veins
let me be empty
and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there
so tired of the straight line
and everywhere you turn
there's vultures and thieves at your back
and the storm keeps on twisting
you keep on building the lie
that you make up for all that you lack
it don't make no difference
escaping one last time
it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
---
23 January, 2003
22 January, 2003
Top 70 Ways To Tell That You Are A Freak Of Nature
By sta
Rank:
1) Last name: Jackson. First name: Michael.
2) you know the speed of an unladen swallow but don't watch monty python.
3) Bald guy in wheelchair keeps trying to recruit you
4) that third breast...but hey, you're popular!
5) Toes are longer than fingers. 23 times longer.
6) you point at things and they explode
7) You. A platypus. Compare and contrast.
8) multiple penii
9) You constantly post "my large intestine" or "Joss sings"
10) You're the dell kid
11) You avidly follow the tv show 'Survivor'
12) Hello, Clarice...
13) You can say "Oh my God there's an axe in my head" in every language
14) that fully functional faucet in your forehead might be a hint
15) You submit more than 17 items to this list.
16) you say "cool beans" or "nifty" at least twice a day.
17) You think Harry Potter is one of the great works of literature.
18) your bed has a name.
19) Blind kids cry when they see you.
20) when in a public bathroom, you try to turn on all 21 motion sensitive dryers.
21) you keep a jar of your own urine
22) your neighborhood has pink sidewalks.
23) You have blue fur all over your body.
24) you like cold spaghetti with salt on it.
25) Twelve Inches ... Around
26) You have a large birthmark on your forehead that clearly reads "666"
27) People on the street point at you and shout Freak! FREAK!
28) you're actually reading this entire list.
29) Extremely Large, Large Intestine Intestine
30) You have dainty little girly hands and your name is Steve
31) Your can type but are otherwise illiterate
32) you know the meaning of the all powerful number 42.
33) Your last name is Frankenstein
34) you can calculate the number of mols in a pair of cotton shorts.
35) You're in college, and you're obsessed with Mario games
36) a sign that says "freak of nature" is pointing at you
37) You have a spare large intestine.
38) you know what Uberschwemmung means.
39) you listen to enrique iglesias.
40) Antennae so big your TV reception is always crystal-clear
41) Children run screaming and crying whenever you enter the room
42) you own anything with a moose or a penguin on it.
43) you are constantly fighting the evil that is communist bob.
44) you've heard of the moosehead room.
45) A second head growing out of your ribcage
46) You have 11 toenails.
47) you have an email address with more than 15 characters in it.
48) you were amused by the mtv show Daria.
49) you have 2 pairs of glasses, making you a "six eyes"
50) your anal probe is constantly beeping
51) you own a piece of clothing that used to be a postage sack
52) you are a lovesick green dolphin covered in postage stamps.
53) Your name is Laura
54) You have grown an evil second head.
55) the only way type of poem you can write sounds just like the cat in the hat.
56) you decorate things with post-it notes
57) you like that song "Hey Ma"
58) you have been stuck in a folding chair or other such object.
59) You can quote Monty Python, Mel Brooks, Star Trek, Star Wars, & LOTR.
60) The foam coming from your mouth scares small children and dogs
61) you've gotten sunburned only on the top of your head.
62) you own weird socks of any kind.
63) you remember pj sparkles.
64) Your job is to be a stationary missle target
65) you have at least one cool nickname.
66) you have visited anipike more than twice.
67) you like Lord of the Rings
68) You can speak and write in Klingon
69) You can translate Klingon to Elvish
70) You believe you ARE one of the characters from Star Wars, Harry Potter, LOTR or Star Trek
The Keepers Welcome You!
By sta
Rank:
1) Last name: Jackson. First name: Michael.
2) you know the speed of an unladen swallow but don't watch monty python.
3) Bald guy in wheelchair keeps trying to recruit you
4) that third breast...but hey, you're popular!
5) Toes are longer than fingers. 23 times longer.
6) you point at things and they explode
7) You. A platypus. Compare and contrast.
8) multiple penii
9) You constantly post "my large intestine" or "Joss sings"
10) You're the dell kid
11) You avidly follow the tv show 'Survivor'
12) Hello, Clarice...
13) You can say "Oh my God there's an axe in my head" in every language
14) that fully functional faucet in your forehead might be a hint
15) You submit more than 17 items to this list.
16) you say "cool beans" or "nifty" at least twice a day.
17) You think Harry Potter is one of the great works of literature.
18) your bed has a name.
19) Blind kids cry when they see you.
20) when in a public bathroom, you try to turn on all 21 motion sensitive dryers.
21) you keep a jar of your own urine
22) your neighborhood has pink sidewalks.
23) You have blue fur all over your body.
24) you like cold spaghetti with salt on it.
25) Twelve Inches ... Around
26) You have a large birthmark on your forehead that clearly reads "666"
27) People on the street point at you and shout Freak! FREAK!
28) you're actually reading this entire list.
29) Extremely Large, Large Intestine Intestine
30) You have dainty little girly hands and your name is Steve
31) Your can type but are otherwise illiterate
32) you know the meaning of the all powerful number 42.
33) Your last name is Frankenstein
34) you can calculate the number of mols in a pair of cotton shorts.
35) You're in college, and you're obsessed with Mario games
36) a sign that says "freak of nature" is pointing at you
37) You have a spare large intestine.
38) you know what Uberschwemmung means.
39) you listen to enrique iglesias.
40) Antennae so big your TV reception is always crystal-clear
41) Children run screaming and crying whenever you enter the room
42) you own anything with a moose or a penguin on it.
43) you are constantly fighting the evil that is communist bob.
44) you've heard of the moosehead room.
45) A second head growing out of your ribcage
46) You have 11 toenails.
47) you have an email address with more than 15 characters in it.
48) you were amused by the mtv show Daria.
49) you have 2 pairs of glasses, making you a "six eyes"
50) your anal probe is constantly beeping
51) you own a piece of clothing that used to be a postage sack
52) you are a lovesick green dolphin covered in postage stamps.
53) Your name is Laura
54) You have grown an evil second head.
55) the only way type of poem you can write sounds just like the cat in the hat.
56) you decorate things with post-it notes
57) you like that song "Hey Ma"
58) you have been stuck in a folding chair or other such object.
59) You can quote Monty Python, Mel Brooks, Star Trek, Star Wars, & LOTR.
60) The foam coming from your mouth scares small children and dogs
61) you've gotten sunburned only on the top of your head.
62) you own weird socks of any kind.
63) you remember pj sparkles.
64) Your job is to be a stationary missle target
65) you have at least one cool nickname.
66) you have visited anipike more than twice.
67) you like Lord of the Rings
68) You can speak and write in Klingon
69) You can translate Klingon to Elvish
70) You believe you ARE one of the characters from Star Wars, Harry Potter, LOTR or Star Trek
The Keepers Welcome You!
Top 51 Ways To Torment An Evil Lawn Gnome
By Emo Kid
Rank:
1) Evil pink flamingos...or maybe large ceramic trolls.
2) Convince the nieghbourhood dogs it's a fire hydrant
3) Put him under your birdfeeder to collect the birds' "deposits"
4) Cute Female Lawn Gnome in a pentagram of Snail and Slug Death
5) Cry 'Havoc' and let loose the Termites of War!!!
6) Give it an Elmo doll for company
7) make another lawn gnome and chop it in half in front of him
8) tie him above the fireplace
9) sick a beaver on him
10) sledgehammer
11) stand it next to one of those lawn geese, and dress it in a matching costume
12) Buy him the book 'Wood Carving for Dummies'
13) start singing "Hi Ho"
14) Force it to associate with Evil Lawn Elves and Evil Lawn Halflings
15) Run around it re-enacting LOTR fight scenes
16) Run it over with the lawn mower of God
17) Introduce it to an Evil Lawn Gnome Salesman
18) Paint on a red target. Here come the pigeons!!!
19) Place Richard Simmons Chia Pets all over your lawn
20) give him a wooden building block and write "you're next" on it
21) Turn the sprinkler system on.
22) Hide your underpants
23) Give out its cell phone number to Telemarketing companies
24) spray him with wood cleaner
25) chip off his "old block"
26) Sledge-a-matic !!!
27) introduce him to your new cat
28) Burn it with gasoline and a match
29) Make him eat a wooden spoon. Cannibal!
30) Hammer a nail up his a@#
31) Lock him away with the Dell Kid
32) Embarrass it by placing it next to the drunk holding the light pole
33) tie him to a chair and make him watch "Snow White"
34) dig a hole in his lawn
35) Take one for a drive.. tied to the back of your car.
36) Lure it in a box with an acorn
37) say "I want your woody!"
38) Turn your toyota tacoma into a low rider. refilm commercial
39) Run them over with a lawnmower.
40) grab an axe and run after him
41) Lock him in a dark basement
42) Paint him red and let the dog loose
43) Put a Newborn Baby at His Doorstep and Observe the Hilarious Consequences
44) take away his tools
45) re-paint it
46) grab a block of wood and put lips on it in a cage
47) say "You'd make a nice guitar"
48) say "look there's a new front yard" and laugh at him
49) bring over Minime or Danny Devito
50) stick tree bark in his bed covers
51) Take his lamp. It will look like he's a neo-Nazi.
The Keepers Welcome You!
By Emo Kid
Rank:
1) Evil pink flamingos...or maybe large ceramic trolls.
2) Convince the nieghbourhood dogs it's a fire hydrant
3) Put him under your birdfeeder to collect the birds' "deposits"
4) Cute Female Lawn Gnome in a pentagram of Snail and Slug Death
5) Cry 'Havoc' and let loose the Termites of War!!!
6) Give it an Elmo doll for company
7) make another lawn gnome and chop it in half in front of him
8) tie him above the fireplace
9) sick a beaver on him
10) sledgehammer
11) stand it next to one of those lawn geese, and dress it in a matching costume
12) Buy him the book 'Wood Carving for Dummies'
13) start singing "Hi Ho"
14) Force it to associate with Evil Lawn Elves and Evil Lawn Halflings
15) Run around it re-enacting LOTR fight scenes
16) Run it over with the lawn mower of God
17) Introduce it to an Evil Lawn Gnome Salesman
18) Paint on a red target. Here come the pigeons!!!
19) Place Richard Simmons Chia Pets all over your lawn
20) give him a wooden building block and write "you're next" on it
21) Turn the sprinkler system on.
22) Hide your underpants
23) Give out its cell phone number to Telemarketing companies
24) spray him with wood cleaner
25) chip off his "old block"
26) Sledge-a-matic !!!
27) introduce him to your new cat
28) Burn it with gasoline and a match
29) Make him eat a wooden spoon. Cannibal!
30) Hammer a nail up his a@#
31) Lock him away with the Dell Kid
32) Embarrass it by placing it next to the drunk holding the light pole
33) tie him to a chair and make him watch "Snow White"
34) dig a hole in his lawn
35) Take one for a drive.. tied to the back of your car.
36) Lure it in a box with an acorn
37) say "I want your woody!"
38) Turn your toyota tacoma into a low rider. refilm commercial
39) Run them over with a lawnmower.
40) grab an axe and run after him
41) Lock him in a dark basement
42) Paint him red and let the dog loose
43) Put a Newborn Baby at His Doorstep and Observe the Hilarious Consequences
44) take away his tools
45) re-paint it
46) grab a block of wood and put lips on it in a cage
47) say "You'd make a nice guitar"
48) say "look there's a new front yard" and laugh at him
49) bring over Minime or Danny Devito
50) stick tree bark in his bed covers
51) Take his lamp. It will look like he's a neo-Nazi.
The Keepers Welcome You!
Top 27 Ways to Get Your McFood for McFree
By Darkhood
Rank:
1) McArmed McRobbery
2) Look in the McDumpster
3) Find a McBug on your McBun
4) Present a McPistol
5) McRun
6) Ow! That McCheesburger burnt my hand!
7) don't mcpay
8) Buy it in Canada with America Money!
9) Work at McDonald's
10) that "thirty second or its free" deal
11) Play the old "You forgot one of my large Fries" Drive Thru scam
12) Become a member of McDonald's board of directors
13) McSteal it.
14) McVomit
15) "Find" a McRoach nugget
16) When thier busy go back in and say they forgot the 2 large fries.
17) "I think there's a rat tail in my fries"
18) Claim you are the re-incarnation of Old Man McGee, Ronald's great great uncle
19) Have sex with the person that takes your order
20) Use a coupon
21) Tell the people at McDonalds that you found a finger in your McFlurry.
22) McLitigate
23) be McJagger
24) Tell Manager you'll report his establishment to State Health Inpsectors
25) What's this pubic hair doing in my burger?!
26) Announce "The employee who brings me my free McFood gets a lapdance!"
27) Give out free lap dances for the employess
The Keepers Welcome You!
By Darkhood
Rank:
1) McArmed McRobbery
2) Look in the McDumpster
3) Find a McBug on your McBun
4) Present a McPistol
5) McRun
6) Ow! That McCheesburger burnt my hand!
7) don't mcpay
8) Buy it in Canada with America Money!
9) Work at McDonald's
10) that "thirty second or its free" deal
11) Play the old "You forgot one of my large Fries" Drive Thru scam
12) Become a member of McDonald's board of directors
13) McSteal it.
14) McVomit
15) "Find" a McRoach nugget
16) When thier busy go back in and say they forgot the 2 large fries.
17) "I think there's a rat tail in my fries"
18) Claim you are the re-incarnation of Old Man McGee, Ronald's great great uncle
19) Have sex with the person that takes your order
20) Use a coupon
21) Tell the people at McDonalds that you found a finger in your McFlurry.
22) McLitigate
23) be McJagger
24) Tell Manager you'll report his establishment to State Health Inpsectors
25) What's this pubic hair doing in my burger?!
26) Announce "The employee who brings me my free McFood gets a lapdance!"
27) Give out free lap dances for the employess
The Keepers Welcome You!
Picture
KID ROCK
Living my life in a slow hell
Different girl every night at the hotel
I ain't seen the sun shine in three damn days
Been fuelin' up on cocaine and whiskey
Wish I had a good girl to miss me
Lord I wonder if I'll ever change my ways
I put your picture away
Sat down and cried today
I can't look at you
While I'm lying next to her
I put your picture away
Sat down and cried today
I can't look at you while I'm lying next to her
oooooooooooo
SHERYL CROW
I called you last night in the hotel
Everyone knows but they won't tell
But their half-hearted smiles tell me something just ain't right
I've been waiting on you for a long time
Fueling up on heartaches and cheap wine
I ain't heard from you in three damn nights
I put your picture away
I wonder where you've been
I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him
oooooooooo
I put your picture away
I wonder where you've been
I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him
oooooooooo
I saw you yesterday with an old friend
KID ROCK
It was the same old same how have you been
BOTH
Since you've been gone my world's been dark and grey
KID ROCK
You reminded me of brighter days
SHERYL CROW
I hoped you were coming home to stay
I was headed to church
KID ROCK
I was off to drink you away
BOTH
I thought about you for a long time
Can't seem to get you off my mind
I can't understand why we're living life this way
I found your picture today
I swear I'll change my ways
I just called to say I want you to come back home
ooooooooo
I found your picture today
I swear I'll change my ways
I just called to say I want you
To come back home
I just called to say I love you
Come back home
KID ROCK
Living my life in a slow hell
Different girl every night at the hotel
I ain't seen the sun shine in three damn days
Been fuelin' up on cocaine and whiskey
Wish I had a good girl to miss me
Lord I wonder if I'll ever change my ways
I put your picture away
Sat down and cried today
I can't look at you
While I'm lying next to her
I put your picture away
Sat down and cried today
I can't look at you while I'm lying next to her
oooooooooooo
SHERYL CROW
I called you last night in the hotel
Everyone knows but they won't tell
But their half-hearted smiles tell me something just ain't right
I've been waiting on you for a long time
Fueling up on heartaches and cheap wine
I ain't heard from you in three damn nights
I put your picture away
I wonder where you've been
I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him
oooooooooo
I put your picture away
I wonder where you've been
I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him
oooooooooo
I saw you yesterday with an old friend
KID ROCK
It was the same old same how have you been
BOTH
Since you've been gone my world's been dark and grey
KID ROCK
You reminded me of brighter days
SHERYL CROW
I hoped you were coming home to stay
I was headed to church
KID ROCK
I was off to drink you away
BOTH
I thought about you for a long time
Can't seem to get you off my mind
I can't understand why we're living life this way
I found your picture today
I swear I'll change my ways
I just called to say I want you to come back home
ooooooooo
I found your picture today
I swear I'll change my ways
I just called to say I want you
To come back home
I just called to say I love you
Come back home
Soul Asylum had a song out about 10 years ago that really says alot about how I feel,
its called;
Runaway Train
Called you up in the middle of the night
Like a firefly without a light
You were there like a blowtorch burning
I was a key that could use a little turning
So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise that I couldn't keep
It seems no one can help me now, I'm in too deep there's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray
Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there
Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded
I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
Here I am just drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train
Everything is cut and dry, day and night, earth and sky
Somehow I just don't believe it
Bought a ticket for a runaway train
Like a madman laughin' at the rain
Little out of touch, little insane
Just easier than dealing with the pain
Runaway train never comin back
Runaway train tearin' up the track
Runaway train burnin' in my veins
Runaway but it always seems the same
there is also a song by fleetwood mac called Storms,
One of the lines in it is;
~ never have I been a blue calm sea, I have always been a storm~
its called;
Runaway Train
Called you up in the middle of the night
Like a firefly without a light
You were there like a blowtorch burning
I was a key that could use a little turning
So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise that I couldn't keep
It seems no one can help me now, I'm in too deep there's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray
Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there
Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded
I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
Here I am just drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train
Everything is cut and dry, day and night, earth and sky
Somehow I just don't believe it
Bought a ticket for a runaway train
Like a madman laughin' at the rain
Little out of touch, little insane
Just easier than dealing with the pain
Runaway train never comin back
Runaway train tearin' up the track
Runaway train burnin' in my veins
Runaway but it always seems the same
there is also a song by fleetwood mac called Storms,
One of the lines in it is;
~ never have I been a blue calm sea, I have always been a storm~
It's all about me:
Unusually Unusual
She's unusually unusual!
She introduced herself as Amy, said call me Caroline for short
She said, I just moved in three doors down so I wouldn't be the girl next door
And I knew the shoes she wasn't wearing fit her just right
And she said "Hey, man did you know that somebody left your grass out in the yard all night?"
Chorus
She's unusually unusual
Absolutely unpredictable, yes she is
She's so different and that's what's wonderful, oh yeah
She's unusually unusual
And that's beautiful to me
She had a tattoo above her ankle of a trident submarine
She said it symbolizes awesome powers hidden deep within our dreams
And her diamond eyes, different in color, held me captive in their light
And she said "Hey, man did you know we used to be brothers, yeah in some past life?"
Chorus
She's unusually unusual
Absolutely unpredictable, yes she is
She's so different and that's what's wonderful, oh yeah
She's unusually unusual
And that's beautiful to me
Some people may thinks she's strange, a different cup of tea
But she just does it for me
Chorus
She's unusually unusual
Absolutely unpredictable, yes she is
She's so different, and that's what's wonderful, oh yeah
She's unusually unusual
And that's beautiful to me
by Lonestar
Unusually Unusual
She's unusually unusual!
She introduced herself as Amy, said call me Caroline for short
She said, I just moved in three doors down so I wouldn't be the girl next door
And I knew the shoes she wasn't wearing fit her just right
And she said "Hey, man did you know that somebody left your grass out in the yard all night?"
Chorus
She's unusually unusual
Absolutely unpredictable, yes she is
She's so different and that's what's wonderful, oh yeah
She's unusually unusual
And that's beautiful to me
She had a tattoo above her ankle of a trident submarine
She said it symbolizes awesome powers hidden deep within our dreams
And her diamond eyes, different in color, held me captive in their light
And she said "Hey, man did you know we used to be brothers, yeah in some past life?"
Chorus
She's unusually unusual
Absolutely unpredictable, yes she is
She's so different and that's what's wonderful, oh yeah
She's unusually unusual
And that's beautiful to me
Some people may thinks she's strange, a different cup of tea
But she just does it for me
Chorus
She's unusually unusual
Absolutely unpredictable, yes she is
She's so different, and that's what's wonderful, oh yeah
She's unusually unusual
And that's beautiful to me
by Lonestar
A little Ani D for me...
squint your eyes and look closer
i'm not between you and your ambition
i am a poster girl with no poster
i am thirty-two flavors and then some
and i'm beyond your peripheral vision
so you might want to turn your head
cause someday you're going to get hungry
and eat most of the words you just said
both my parents taught me about good will
and i have done well by their names
just the kindness i've lavished on strangers
is more than i can explain
still there's many who've turned out their porch lights
just so i would think they were not home
and hid in the dark of their windows
till i'd passed and left them alone
and god help you if you are an ugly girl
course too pretty is also your doom
cause everyone harbors a secret hatred
for the prettiest girl in the room
and god help you if you are a phoenix
and you dare to rise up from the ash
a thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy
while you are just flying past
i'm not trying to give my life meaning
by demeaning you
and i would like to state for the record
i did everything that i could do
i'm not saying that i'm a saint
i just don't want to live that way
no, i will never be a saint
but i will always say
squint your eyes and look closer
Ani Di Franco
squint your eyes and look closer
i'm not between you and your ambition
i am a poster girl with no poster
i am thirty-two flavors and then some
and i'm beyond your peripheral vision
so you might want to turn your head
cause someday you're going to get hungry
and eat most of the words you just said
both my parents taught me about good will
and i have done well by their names
just the kindness i've lavished on strangers
is more than i can explain
still there's many who've turned out their porch lights
just so i would think they were not home
and hid in the dark of their windows
till i'd passed and left them alone
and god help you if you are an ugly girl
course too pretty is also your doom
cause everyone harbors a secret hatred
for the prettiest girl in the room
and god help you if you are a phoenix
and you dare to rise up from the ash
a thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy
while you are just flying past
i'm not trying to give my life meaning
by demeaning you
and i would like to state for the record
i did everything that i could do
i'm not saying that i'm a saint
i just don't want to live that way
no, i will never be a saint
but i will always say
squint your eyes and look closer
Ani Di Franco
"Me" By Paula Cole
ME
I am not the person who is singing
I am the silent one inside
I am not the one who laughs at people's jokes
I just pasify their egos
I am not my house, my car, or my songs
They are only stops along my way
I am like the winter
I'm a dark cold female
With golden pail of wisdom in my path
And it's me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence
I am carrying my voice
I am carrying my heart
I am carrying my rhythm
I am carrying my prayers
But you can't kill my spirit
It's so old and strong
Like a mountain, I'll go on and on
When my wings are frozen
The brightly colored moth
Runs into the dirt into the ground
And it's me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence
And it's me who's too weak
And it's me who's too shy
To ask for the thing I love
And it's me who's too weak
And it's me who's too shy
To ask for the thing I love
I am walking on the bridge
I am over the water
And I'm scared as hell
But I know there's something better
Yes, I know there's something better
Yes, I know, Yes, I know
But I love
But I love
But I love
But I love
ME
I am not the person who is singing
I am the silent one inside
I am not the one who laughs at people's jokes
I just pasify their egos
I am not my house, my car, or my songs
They are only stops along my way
I am like the winter
I'm a dark cold female
With golden pail of wisdom in my path
And it's me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence
I am carrying my voice
I am carrying my heart
I am carrying my rhythm
I am carrying my prayers
But you can't kill my spirit
It's so old and strong
Like a mountain, I'll go on and on
When my wings are frozen
The brightly colored moth
Runs into the dirt into the ground
And it's me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence
And it's me who's too weak
And it's me who's too shy
To ask for the thing I love
And it's me who's too weak
And it's me who's too shy
To ask for the thing I love
I am walking on the bridge
I am over the water
And I'm scared as hell
But I know there's something better
Yes, I know there's something better
Yes, I know, Yes, I know
But I love
But I love
But I love
But I love
21 January, 2003
Honoring Self
Find a sacred space where you are able to hold yourself more gently.
Let the healing silence enfold you.
As you breathe in and out release the heaviness that burdens your soul, let go of the should’s and ought to’s that have held you down.
In this magic moment let the silence become your friend, let the quiet rush of love hold your healing heart, soothing the bumps and bruises you have collected this day and other days like this.
In this sacred space,
honor your body, it has carried you through this day,
honor your spirit, it has remained unbroken in times of great pain,
honor your laughter, it has helped you through many tough moments,
honor your tears, they are cleansing for your spirit,
honor your sadness, it has many lessons to share,
honor your mistakes, learn from them
honor your resilience, you have survived much,
honor your healing, allow it time.
We have dishonored ourselves too often, in this space only allow healing, wholeness and silence to enter. Begin and end each day with honor towards your spirit, your self.
Sending healing your way,
Compassion
Find a sacred space where you are able to hold yourself more gently.
Let the healing silence enfold you.
As you breathe in and out release the heaviness that burdens your soul, let go of the should’s and ought to’s that have held you down.
In this magic moment let the silence become your friend, let the quiet rush of love hold your healing heart, soothing the bumps and bruises you have collected this day and other days like this.
In this sacred space,
honor your body, it has carried you through this day,
honor your spirit, it has remained unbroken in times of great pain,
honor your laughter, it has helped you through many tough moments,
honor your tears, they are cleansing for your spirit,
honor your sadness, it has many lessons to share,
honor your mistakes, learn from them
honor your resilience, you have survived much,
honor your healing, allow it time.
We have dishonored ourselves too often, in this space only allow healing, wholeness and silence to enter. Begin and end each day with honor towards your spirit, your self.
Sending healing your way,
Compassion
Here is something else...
Surrender
There is a gentle power, a subtle shift, a sigh, when we surrender.
When we are able to release what we believe, what we hold dear, what we are fighting for, we stand tall in the knowledge that they will remain until we are able to pick them up again.
Surrender to the fatigue, the tiredness, the exhaustion. Release yourself of the idea tht you are the only one, that you are the one that this fight depends on.
Relax into the gentle arms of the one that loves you, of the soft pillows upon your bed, feel yourself slip away into the warm sudsy water of a bath.
Let it go.
This is not yours to carry alone.
Stop fighting, stop the struggling, silence the chorus in your head.
Surrender.
Allow yourself the break, or the fatigue will break you.
For the moment just
pause.
Restore
Relax
Rejuvenate
Invigorate
Find the strength in letting go.
You have permission.
Love,
Compassion
borrowd from SARK MMB
Surrender
There is a gentle power, a subtle shift, a sigh, when we surrender.
When we are able to release what we believe, what we hold dear, what we are fighting for, we stand tall in the knowledge that they will remain until we are able to pick them up again.
Surrender to the fatigue, the tiredness, the exhaustion. Release yourself of the idea tht you are the only one, that you are the one that this fight depends on.
Relax into the gentle arms of the one that loves you, of the soft pillows upon your bed, feel yourself slip away into the warm sudsy water of a bath.
Let it go.
This is not yours to carry alone.
Stop fighting, stop the struggling, silence the chorus in your head.
Surrender.
Allow yourself the break, or the fatigue will break you.
For the moment just
pause.
Restore
Relax
Rejuvenate
Invigorate
Find the strength in letting go.
You have permission.
Love,
Compassion
borrowd from SARK MMB
10 January, 2003
going to go home and go to sleep and pray that I see myMike soon......
i need closure to this fucking issue...
i need to see those brown eyes and his little grin and try not to smile...
you know what i would give anything in the world for right now?
to be in his arms.... he hugs me when he gets outta the car.... but i mean i want a full body contact arms wrapped around me safely enfolded shielded from the world hug.....
i bet a hug from him could make it all go away..... i've just got this feeling....
i need closure to this fucking issue...
i need to see those brown eyes and his little grin and try not to smile...
you know what i would give anything in the world for right now?
to be in his arms.... he hugs me when he gets outta the car.... but i mean i want a full body contact arms wrapped around me safely enfolded shielded from the world hug.....
i bet a hug from him could make it all go away..... i've just got this feeling....
Author Topic: Thursday Soul Food
Willow Wand posted 2003-09-01 10:00
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Soulmusing: Judge Not, Lest....
Judging only affects the person being judged, right? Nope. Say you
look at a fat person and think, "Look at how fat he is. What a slob.
He must be lazy and fat and stupid." Does that affect the person you
are looking at? No. You affect yourself. You in effect send a message
to yourself saying that fat is bad, and that there is something wrong
with fat people. Guess what happens when you gain five pounds? That
judgment is stored in your mental wiring, you unwittingly apply it to
yourself, and your own self-esteem suffers.
Acceptance goes around, and so does judgment. Think about the guy in
your circle of friends who's easy-going and fun, and who never has an
unkind thing to say. Everybody wants to be around him. Even when he
does something that is not so bright, you laugh it off as a "quirk".
On the other hand, consider the resident critic. The one who's always
full of negative opinions, whether they are expressed openly or shown
merely by a raised eyebrow. What happens when he does something
wrong? Are you as willing to write it off as a quirk, or are you
quick to either point out his fault or to silently gloat? Judging
begets judging... acceptance begets acceptance.
In this life, your view of another person can never be accurate. You
are not sharing their reality, and you don't know all the factors
that make their behavior what it is. The fat person you saw might
have a glandular problem brought on by the experimental drug he's
taking to combat his thyroid cancer. The co-worker who throws herself
at every man in the office whether he's married or not might be
acting out of low self-esteem because she was subjected to repeated
abuse as a child. You never know.
That is not to say that you have to like, agree with or encourage the
behavior you find disturbing. Just don't judge it. Maintain more of
an "I wonder why" attitude when confronted with actions you would
normally judge. ("Hmmm.. I wonder why Jim feels the need to drink so
much", for example, instead of "That Jim is one stinky old drunk!")
This is a much more humane way to deal with people, and the effect of
it is that you yourself don't get judged as much. What a bonus!
Willow Wand posted 2003-09-01 10:00
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Soulmusing: Judge Not, Lest....
Judging only affects the person being judged, right? Nope. Say you
look at a fat person and think, "Look at how fat he is. What a slob.
He must be lazy and fat and stupid." Does that affect the person you
are looking at? No. You affect yourself. You in effect send a message
to yourself saying that fat is bad, and that there is something wrong
with fat people. Guess what happens when you gain five pounds? That
judgment is stored in your mental wiring, you unwittingly apply it to
yourself, and your own self-esteem suffers.
Acceptance goes around, and so does judgment. Think about the guy in
your circle of friends who's easy-going and fun, and who never has an
unkind thing to say. Everybody wants to be around him. Even when he
does something that is not so bright, you laugh it off as a "quirk".
On the other hand, consider the resident critic. The one who's always
full of negative opinions, whether they are expressed openly or shown
merely by a raised eyebrow. What happens when he does something
wrong? Are you as willing to write it off as a quirk, or are you
quick to either point out his fault or to silently gloat? Judging
begets judging... acceptance begets acceptance.
In this life, your view of another person can never be accurate. You
are not sharing their reality, and you don't know all the factors
that make their behavior what it is. The fat person you saw might
have a glandular problem brought on by the experimental drug he's
taking to combat his thyroid cancer. The co-worker who throws herself
at every man in the office whether he's married or not might be
acting out of low self-esteem because she was subjected to repeated
abuse as a child. You never know.
That is not to say that you have to like, agree with or encourage the
behavior you find disturbing. Just don't judge it. Maintain more of
an "I wonder why" attitude when confronted with actions you would
normally judge. ("Hmmm.. I wonder why Jim feels the need to drink so
much", for example, instead of "That Jim is one stinky old drunk!")
This is a much more humane way to deal with people, and the effect of
it is that you yourself don't get judged as much. What a bonus!
Ways To Focus on the Moment
No matter what life is handing you, all you have is the moment, the
present. Stay focused on it and in it. Live it to the fullest, live
it in a way that would cause you no regrets if you learned it was to
be your last on earth.
1. Be Still. When life is stressful, hectic, or seemingly
unmanageable, just stop. Be still and take yourself out of the
craziness. Retreat into your inner world for guidance. During these
times, it might be your only opportunity for peace and balance. If
what you seek without or around you cannot be found, find it within.
2. Use Your Senses. The best way to take yourself out of the outer
world that is no longer making sense or working for you, is to
experience life (your life) through your senses. Open your eyes to
the beauty around you, lose yourself in lovely music, exchange words
with positive people in your life, enjoy a sensational feast with
someone or many you care for, and savor the smells and the tastes in
your life. You might even decide to go for broke .... touch someone
and mean it!
3. Keep Being You. Respect the warning to be cautious and aware
during your daily routines, but continue with your plans and goals-
the things that have meaning for you. Work toward them in a way that
does not put you out on a limb or cause undue risk, but don't
abandon them. Having a purpose and goals gives direction to our
lives. Take the steps to realize your goals, perhaps, on the slow
track for now, but just don't let go of them.
4. Extend Yourself. Do more. Be more. Now is the perfect time to get
involved-with your neighbors, the charity you've been researching,
building deeper bonds of friendship, and appreciating the people in
your life fully. When faced with the thought of catastrophe
occurring at any time, panic and fear are only two options. Another
one is to take the focus off of the unthinkable. Focus on
appreciating what is and what could be in your life.
5. Claim a Perspective That Empowers and Enables You. The one you
decide on isn't so important. What matters is that it works for you.
As always, if what you're doing isn't working, try something else-
and fast. If you're sitting at home out of the mix, worrying about
opening your mail or going to work the next day, you need a
different perspective. Adopt a winning one. Your life is always what
you make it during glorious times as well as the challenging ones.
Keep living, and keep striving to be your best you.
6. Keep Going. Feel what you feel-sadness, fear, uncertainty-but
keep moving forward. Go to work, do household chores, visit with
family and friends in person or via telephone or e-mail, take out
the trash, buy that lovely suit that caught your eye, try that new
recipe, extend and accept invitations, drastically change your hair
color or style, or any other option in an endless list of
possibilities. Just keep going and, most importantly, enjoy the
moments.
This is your life. You owe it to yourself to live it. It may seem
different and uncertain now. However, the external changes to our
lives are just that-external. There are entire schools of thought
that speak in-depth on the importance of one's internal life … of
unshakeable serenity, peace, and balance. If you really think about
it, many times our internal (or inner) lives and strengths are all
that matter when the world around us is unsure and changing.
Be yourself and let your inner light shine. I mean, really be
yourself-for some, in a way and fashion you've never dared before.
You have so much more to gain than you could ever lose.
No matter what life is handing you, all you have is the moment, the
present. Stay focused on it and in it. Live it to the fullest, live
it in a way that would cause you no regrets if you learned it was to
be your last on earth.
1. Be Still. When life is stressful, hectic, or seemingly
unmanageable, just stop. Be still and take yourself out of the
craziness. Retreat into your inner world for guidance. During these
times, it might be your only opportunity for peace and balance. If
what you seek without or around you cannot be found, find it within.
2. Use Your Senses. The best way to take yourself out of the outer
world that is no longer making sense or working for you, is to
experience life (your life) through your senses. Open your eyes to
the beauty around you, lose yourself in lovely music, exchange words
with positive people in your life, enjoy a sensational feast with
someone or many you care for, and savor the smells and the tastes in
your life. You might even decide to go for broke .... touch someone
and mean it!
3. Keep Being You. Respect the warning to be cautious and aware
during your daily routines, but continue with your plans and goals-
the things that have meaning for you. Work toward them in a way that
does not put you out on a limb or cause undue risk, but don't
abandon them. Having a purpose and goals gives direction to our
lives. Take the steps to realize your goals, perhaps, on the slow
track for now, but just don't let go of them.
4. Extend Yourself. Do more. Be more. Now is the perfect time to get
involved-with your neighbors, the charity you've been researching,
building deeper bonds of friendship, and appreciating the people in
your life fully. When faced with the thought of catastrophe
occurring at any time, panic and fear are only two options. Another
one is to take the focus off of the unthinkable. Focus on
appreciating what is and what could be in your life.
5. Claim a Perspective That Empowers and Enables You. The one you
decide on isn't so important. What matters is that it works for you.
As always, if what you're doing isn't working, try something else-
and fast. If you're sitting at home out of the mix, worrying about
opening your mail or going to work the next day, you need a
different perspective. Adopt a winning one. Your life is always what
you make it during glorious times as well as the challenging ones.
Keep living, and keep striving to be your best you.
6. Keep Going. Feel what you feel-sadness, fear, uncertainty-but
keep moving forward. Go to work, do household chores, visit with
family and friends in person or via telephone or e-mail, take out
the trash, buy that lovely suit that caught your eye, try that new
recipe, extend and accept invitations, drastically change your hair
color or style, or any other option in an endless list of
possibilities. Just keep going and, most importantly, enjoy the
moments.
This is your life. You owe it to yourself to live it. It may seem
different and uncertain now. However, the external changes to our
lives are just that-external. There are entire schools of thought
that speak in-depth on the importance of one's internal life … of
unshakeable serenity, peace, and balance. If you really think about
it, many times our internal (or inner) lives and strengths are all
that matter when the world around us is unsure and changing.
Be yourself and let your inner light shine. I mean, really be
yourself-for some, in a way and fashion you've never dared before.
You have so much more to gain than you could ever lose.
"The Wit and Wisdom of Isadora Wing (Amanuensis to Zeitgeist)... 'Have Pen,
Will Travel'
1) Renounce useless guilt.
2.) Don't make a cult of suffering.
3.) Live in the Now (or at least in the Soon).
4.) Always do the things you fear the most;
courage is an acquired taste like caviar.
5.) Trust all joy.
6.) If the evil eye fixes you in its gaze, look elsewhere.
7.) Get ready to be eighty-seven.
'To be continued...' "
Will Travel'
1) Renounce useless guilt.
2.) Don't make a cult of suffering.
3.) Live in the Now (or at least in the Soon).
4.) Always do the things you fear the most;
courage is an acquired taste like caviar.
5.) Trust all joy.
6.) If the evil eye fixes you in its gaze, look elsewhere.
7.) Get ready to be eighty-seven.
'To be continued...' "
09 January, 2003
found on the Camp SARK MMB:
I am a daughter of Mother Earth and Father sky.
I believe in both the Lord and the Lady, Father and Mother, Goddesses and God.
I follow the path of an eclectic witch, mixing and matching the paths and laws.
I believe in Karma (what comes around goes around.) and the law of three.
I am not a Wiccan.
I am the daughter of Mother Earth and Father Sky.
~wildIng~
goddesses and gods
CSWW
I am a daughter of Mother Earth and Father sky.
I believe in both the Lord and the Lady, Father and Mother, Goddesses and God.
I follow the path of an eclectic witch, mixing and matching the paths and laws.
I believe in Karma (what comes around goes around.) and the law of three.
I am not a Wiccan.
I am the daughter of Mother Earth and Father Sky.
~wildIng~
goddesses and gods
CSWW
Last fall when my fiance left my a month and a 1/2 before our wedding, I thought I was destroyed. Then I began to realise that it was (almost) a blessing, because it forced me to reevaluate what I wanted and what makes me happy.
So I have been going about the business of enjoying the single life for the 1st time in about 6 years...
Then a couple weeks ago this guy starts at work.. Mike...
Something tells me he's trouble (not bad trouble, but kinda trouble), but I can't help myself. I've been flirting with him and then my girlfriend said she'd asked him about me and he liked me... so I offerred him a ride home one night when the weather was crappy. On the way, I admitted I liked him and he, eventually, admitted the same.
The thing that sucks here is that he's on work release. HOLD ON LADIES, DON'T START IN YET!! But he's a really great guy and he explained to me clearly why he's in jail to start with.. it's a long story, but trust me, it's nothing bad- just some vandalism...
So the thing is, I only get to see him at work and we get to talk when I take him home or on the way to work... Things have been moving very slowly (which is a good thing for us both at this point) these last couple days... He kissed me on the cheek and we even progressed to holding hands...
This may sound boring, but to me and my massive co-dependence someone who moves slowly and me having to move slowly is just what I need...
But yesterday...I got to thinking wwaaayyy tooo much... I spend most of my time at work in the back drive-thru window, and he runs the grills, so I can just kinda stand back there watching him and we joke and such... it actually makes the day pleasant (and Goddess knows all I have to do is think of him and I can't help but smile...if someone mentions his name I start giggling like a damn schoolgirl....). And I got to thinking that I just know I'm gonna get hurt... I just have this feeling... My head keeps going, "You're gonna get hurt again. He's gonna figure out you're not who he thinks you are or what he wants..." But my hopeless romantic little heart was just skipping along obstinantly like "I'm not listening. I don't care. I'm gonna do it anyway. Nyah! Nyah!"
Today we were sitting out by the lake talking (me doing mosta the talking coz he's the quiet type) and I brought up the fact that he seems to be thinking an awful lot and never says much... so how am I sposeta get to know him if he never talks...
So he was telling me what he thinks the most about is getting to go home and sleep in his own bed, etc. (Which I can totaly respect and understand) He said that's all he really cares about at this point. His actual words were something like "It's like I care abour you, but I don't. All I care about is going home." Now, I totally understood where he was coming from and what he really meant, but I still couldn't stop it. I sank. I was hurt, I was upset that he said he didn't care (lemme say that I always invest myself far too much in everything). He was trying to say something to make me feel better, trying to reword it so I wasn't hurt, but by that time I hadda take him back to the center....
Now there's this big hole in my heart where this blissful, little happy place was earlier today. That evil logic demon in my head is preaching "See, I told you you'd get hurt! See I told you he didn't care as much as you did! But you wouldn't listen!" And my hopeless romantic is broken and crying in a corner....
I won't see him tomorrow... and IF he gets his 9 hour pass, I may see him Saturday.... otherwise I just hafta pray I see him at work Monday....
So I have been going about the business of enjoying the single life for the 1st time in about 6 years...
Then a couple weeks ago this guy starts at work.. Mike...
Something tells me he's trouble (not bad trouble, but kinda trouble), but I can't help myself. I've been flirting with him and then my girlfriend said she'd asked him about me and he liked me... so I offerred him a ride home one night when the weather was crappy. On the way, I admitted I liked him and he, eventually, admitted the same.
The thing that sucks here is that he's on work release. HOLD ON LADIES, DON'T START IN YET!! But he's a really great guy and he explained to me clearly why he's in jail to start with.. it's a long story, but trust me, it's nothing bad- just some vandalism...
So the thing is, I only get to see him at work and we get to talk when I take him home or on the way to work... Things have been moving very slowly (which is a good thing for us both at this point) these last couple days... He kissed me on the cheek and we even progressed to holding hands...
This may sound boring, but to me and my massive co-dependence someone who moves slowly and me having to move slowly is just what I need...
But yesterday...I got to thinking wwaaayyy tooo much... I spend most of my time at work in the back drive-thru window, and he runs the grills, so I can just kinda stand back there watching him and we joke and such... it actually makes the day pleasant (and Goddess knows all I have to do is think of him and I can't help but smile...if someone mentions his name I start giggling like a damn schoolgirl....). And I got to thinking that I just know I'm gonna get hurt... I just have this feeling... My head keeps going, "You're gonna get hurt again. He's gonna figure out you're not who he thinks you are or what he wants..." But my hopeless romantic little heart was just skipping along obstinantly like "I'm not listening. I don't care. I'm gonna do it anyway. Nyah! Nyah!"
Today we were sitting out by the lake talking (me doing mosta the talking coz he's the quiet type) and I brought up the fact that he seems to be thinking an awful lot and never says much... so how am I sposeta get to know him if he never talks...
So he was telling me what he thinks the most about is getting to go home and sleep in his own bed, etc. (Which I can totaly respect and understand) He said that's all he really cares about at this point. His actual words were something like "It's like I care abour you, but I don't. All I care about is going home." Now, I totally understood where he was coming from and what he really meant, but I still couldn't stop it. I sank. I was hurt, I was upset that he said he didn't care (lemme say that I always invest myself far too much in everything). He was trying to say something to make me feel better, trying to reword it so I wasn't hurt, but by that time I hadda take him back to the center....
Now there's this big hole in my heart where this blissful, little happy place was earlier today. That evil logic demon in my head is preaching "See, I told you you'd get hurt! See I told you he didn't care as much as you did! But you wouldn't listen!" And my hopeless romantic is broken and crying in a corner....
I won't see him tomorrow... and IF he gets his 9 hour pass, I may see him Saturday.... otherwise I just hafta pray I see him at work Monday....
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